Update

Unfortunately, I was not offered either positions I interviewed for about a week or so ago. The TA position was given to a local person, which I new that I wasn't going to it it because the Superintendent was straight-forward with me and told me that there was a lot of local politics involved with this decision. I guess there was a lot of pressure to hire local. The Board of Education was who decided who would get this position. The Special Education Position at the school I use to go to went to a woman who works at the school as a TA. I found out on the same day that I did not get either position...rejected twice in one day = tough! When Justin got home I obviously told him, then I asked if he was going to break up with me because I don't think I could handle being rejected 3 times in one day. He told he wasn't going to break up with me. Later in bed, I asked again, but said you're not going to went till tomorrow so you're not the ass the broke up with a girl who was already rejected 2 times that day. I found out about the first one about 9:30am and the other one about 1pm. After I found out about the twice one, I was in tears off and on throughout the whole day. I was bad and even tried comforting myself with Chocolate Peanut Cup Ice Cream, which of course didn't work! Justin and I already had plans to go over to his parents' house for dinner. I can't really remember what we had for dinner, but I know there were some killer green beans that I LOVED! I don't normally drink it it, but I had quite a few glasses (4oz each) of red wine. It was tasting pretty good to me that day and it actually did help me relax and calm down. Obviously, I'm disappointed that I didn't get either jobs, but it's the fact that we needed one of those position to make sure we could afford rent every month. Right now, we are scraping every penny we can. The only thing we have bought in the past week or so is milk. We are living off of whatever food we had in the house already, which is mainly pasta. I know eating a lot of pasta is not good for trying to lose weight, but it's either eat that or nothing at all. Just yesterday, Justin's mom and his Grandma bought us some groceries, so now we have some meat and stuff for a while. Also, I feel like now that I have to go find any job I can and that will take me out of schools, which will make it even harder to find a teaching position....so I really feel like I have to give up on my dream. Needless to say, life has been very stressful lately! 

43.2 pounds down, 116.8 more pounds to go